Obesity (or Why My Body is My Business)

This is not a post about the “Goddess in all of us” or “ultimate love” or any other white-lightey fluffy bullshit.  Those aren’t my things and I’m not qualified to discuss them without massive amounts of eye-rolling and snark.  If they’re yours, well, feel free to take what I’m saying here and put it into language that better suits your point of view.

This is a post to address an issue that’s all over the blogosphere and a Pagan Blog Project post all wrapped into one.

I am a FlameKeeper.  This means that, even if I don’t like you, or don’t agree with your actions, I recognize your divinity.  I acknowledge that you are who you are and that’s okay.  Your divinity isn’t lessened if you don’t look like me, or live like me, or believe what I believe…even when I wish it were otherwise. 😉

I believe that morality is fluid and situational.  There is no concrete moral truth to be followed; there is no one thing that, if everyone did it, has no negative consequences.  I can determine what I would do in a given situation but just because I might do X doesn’t mean that Y might be a better choice for someone else.  I saw a perfect example of this on a National Geographic Channel show a few weeks ago: a woman with a baby is hiding in a building with others as rebel forces kill their way through a village.  The baby begins crying.  The woman has to choose between smothering her infant to potentially save everyone in the building or allowing the baby to cry which would ensure the rebels would find the group.

I (try to) live by the concept of Need to Know.  I examine situations to determine how (and if) they affect me.  If they don’t, even if I’m interested in what is going on I operate on the principle that I don’t need to know.  I may want to, but don’t need to.

The sum of these three things means that I believe that how you live is not really any of my business unless your choices are directly infringing on my ability to live my own life.  And, since I believe this, it therefore means I believe that the same goes for my own life.  My polyamory and pansexuality are not your business, unless you are a (potential) sexual partner.  The fact that I choose to pay for my son’s college education instead of allowing him to take on loans is not your business, unless your money is involved.  The fact that I am a gamer is not your business, unless you share a television with me or unless I’ve kicked your ass online.

This also applies to my body.  What I choose to put into my body is not your business.  What I choose to take out of my body is not your business.  How much I weigh is not your business.   The only thing even closely related to my body that is your business is how you choose to relate to me.  And, frankly, if you choose to fat-shame, or counsel me about my weight when you aren’t my doctor, or make snide comments you claim are out of love, well, I’m writing you off as Divine despite all evidence to the contrary.

Fuck off, fat-shamers.  You can take me as I am or not take me at all.

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12 responses to “Obesity (or Why My Body is My Business)

  1. I agree on a personal level, though I do think the obesity problem in the US is a policy issue. That doesn’t mean I’m down for fat shaming though I would be down for big-farm and industrial food complex shaming. Full disclosure on that: I was a vegetarian and vegan for many, many years of my life and still have a pretty healthy diet overall and I am still Fat. I also had a serious eating disorder for most of my life so, for me all the fat shaming in the pagan world is especially problematic.

  2. Pingback: Orthodoxy vs. Orthopraxy « Innocence and Immanence

  3. Well written. I totally agree with you, people tend to care to much about other people’s business. I have chosen not to have kids, but when or if I do, adoption is the only option. This causes great discussions and many comments. But this body is my temple and the choice is mine, whatever people say. I don’t tell others how they should live their lives so they better stay the hell out of mine.
    Back to the fat shaming. I did not know ths problem existed in the pagan world until I read this post, maybe not in Sweden, the pagan world here is not that big perhaps. But it doesn’t matter, people have no right, big or small world, to interfere in others’ lives pretending to be som kind of hobby experts.

    Blessed be!

    • I love that word!

      Seriously though, we have to examine each unique scenario in which we find ourselves to determine what, if anything, affects us and what, if anything, our actions will be.

      • Soooo this is Katje, and I’m pretty sure I never typed the comment above. I think my mom was logged into my other WordPress (she never checks what account she’s on, even on my computers!). It looks like her writing style.

        Either that, or I’ve got hackers. =\

  4. Pingback: Orthodoxy vs. Orthopraxy | Morag Spinner

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